Review : Cinderella (2015/PG) 

Ahem “spoiler” Cinderella marries the prince, however if your shocked by that ending, stop reading the blog as we’re disappointed in you for not knowing the fairytale or the 1950 film this movie is based on. Your probally already saying to yourself why are we reviewing Cinderella when we did a one scene preview of the film back on January 19th, 2015? Basically we can tell if a movie or tv show is good or bad within the first 90 seconds, but we did feel it was fair to review the whole movie too (especially because it wasn’t written by Michael Ardnt.) Let’s get this out of the way, this is basically Downton (or downtown or what ever the fuck it’s called, we don’t care, all we watch on PBS is Nova, The Red Green Show, and still bitch 3-2-1 Contact isn’t aired anymore) Abbey the motion picture. That means it’s crammed to the gills with that stuffy, dry, tight lipped melowdrama horse shit. As three characters die of mystery illness like most Disney movies. That right there would scream terrible movie alert, but this is where the strength of director Kenneth Branagh shines through. You can tell he’s well aware this is a remake and appealing to that Downton Abbey / animated Cinderella niche, and serves up the plot, drama, and stiff upper lip BS that fans will just gobble up. Of course it’s not all credit to the director, we were blown away with performance of Cate Blanchett as the wicked step mother. We think the Oscars have become total bullshit (as we love to quote George C Scott’s opinion on it “It’s a goddamn meat parade”) but she reminded us of how Larry Hagman played J.R. Ewing on Dallas and how we loved to hate the villian. It’s that same kind of top notch first teir finely tuned craft of acting that totally makes a film work with just that one role. Also praise to for Helena Bonham Carter as the narrator/fairy godmother who while being on screen for only 10 minuets, steals the show, and leaves you wanting more scenes with her character. Look we know we’re hard on and downright mean and hateful to the drama genre, as thanks to TV shows it the bane of our exististance. However something like this exquisite work comes along to give the bloated, over saccharined, and increasingly lazy  genre a much need slap in the face and violent shake by the collar that screams “NO! This is how you do drama right!”

On a scale of 1.0 to 5.9 it got a 5.2 out of 5.9

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