Friday Special: Odd Thomas (2013/NR)

Look we know we said we’re trying to be more positive when it comes to our movie reviews, but when a film pisses is off we’re going to yell and point fingers. Odd Thomas was a good movie until the last 2 minuets (give or take) of the film that like Into the Woods (don’t worry that review is coming) fucks it up so badly you have to watch a pallet cleanser after it (for us it was Reno 911: Miami.) So what did this film do so wrong to piss us off? As usual it’s another bad case of Star Trek 2 syndrome. The character Stormy dies at the end for no good reason. So let’s play the blame game, that would lie squarely on writer-director Stephen Sommers. How dare he pull the rug out from under us after we gave him 90 minuets of our time, it’s rude, selfish, and downright egotistical horseshit that makes us hard movies so much! Seriously this guy brought us The Mummy, and G.I. Joe, exactly how did fuck up so bad it’s on par with Michael Arndt. Yes everyone can argue “But it was based on a book so blame its author Dean Koontz.” Bullshit we say, so many movies are based on books (loosely based is more accurate) but they change details so much its an original story, so in the end the screen writer is the total asshole and to blame for this cinematic turd, that was killed by the last 2 fucking minuets!

On a scale of 1.0 to 5.9 it got a 1.4 out of 5.9

Like E-Mod 116 Online on Facebook and tell us what you like us to review.

E-Mod 116 Online on Facebook

Advertisements

Review : Back Issues : The Hustler Magazine Story (2014/TV-MA)

If The People vs Larry Flynt had been a documentary, more then likely it would have been this film. Where as the Hollywood scripted movie more or less covered up to the late 80s this continues the story to present day. This is also more a story of the evolution of business then of free speech, as it shows how Larry Flynt and his publication company that produce Hustler magazine constantly have to keep up and reinvent themselves to stay current (their like the Apple of porn in a sense.) No matter if it’s adult entertainment or selling bowling shoes, buiness is business and seeing how a Titan of thee industry understands it so well it was makes this so fascinating to watch.

Back Issues : The Hustler Magazine Story Trailer (Archstone Distribution/2014)

On a scale of 1.0 to 5.9 it got a 5.0 out of 5.9

Like E-Mod 116 Online on Facebook and tell us what you like us to review.

E-Mod 116 Online on Facebook

Friday Special: Sharknado 3 : Oh Hell No! (2015/TV-14)

Yes we know our format change said no more TV reviews, but since it’s a movie and the previous two films are now streaming on Netflix, the film qualifies for a review. We’ve seen the previous two Sharknado films (E-Mod 116 Online was in its 10 year plus cold storage at the time) and we loved them. These are terrible films but they are fun to watch, much like Fifty Shades of Grey (wait we posted that review right? Oh we didn’t? Um when is that? October 13th. Well, yeah then come back for that review too!) Back on topic then, why are fuses terrible films so good? I mean honestly how long is this review so far, and we haven’t even said what the plot is about. The answer is more like what plot. It’s a Sharknado movie, there are tornados with sharks that rain down distruction on people. His time is Orlando, Florida and Universal Studios Orlando (you might remember them with our HHN 24 review.) Not much changes with these films, Fin still has a chainsaw (so that means someone gets sawed out of a shark who swallowed them. Matt Lauer and the Today show always have a small corporate synergy part (FYI Universal Studios opens at 9am, well after the main anchors of the Today show are done.) The celebrity cameos get more insane, the premise gets even more outlandish (The Hoff plays an astronaut) and this time there are sharks in space. Seriously the film could only go there because it need to be over the top. In the end get some fronds together and have some drinks, as this is perfect mindless popcorn entertainment!

Sharknado 3 : Oh Hell No! Trailer (The Asylum/2015)

On a scale of 1.0 to 5.9 got a 5.6 out of 5.9

Like E-Mod 116 Online on Facebook and tell us what you like us to review.

E-Mod 116 Online on Facebook

Review : 22 Jump Street (2014/R)

Remember back in 1995 when The Brady Bunch Movie was released and was a hit, only to be followed in 1996 by A Very Brady Sequel, well as usual history repeated itself with 21 Jump Street and now it’s sequel 22 Jump Street. Like the second Brady Bunch movie, this film to knows it has to be not only a satire but a parody of its whole cliched genre. Back again are Channing Tatum and Johna Hill as Schmidt and Jenko, and this time there playing them even more cartoony and larger then life which amplifies the comedy and chesseness of whole story. The film is self aware that it’s a sequel and the same as the first but also that it’s most likely the start of a franchise which it cleverly mocks in the closing credits. While there no dick shooting off this time (well not literally) it shows however what can happen when a film knows what it is and only what it is.

22 Jump Street Trailer (Columbia Pictures/2014)

On a scale of 1.0 to 5.9 it got a 5.4 out of 5.9

Like E-Mod 116 Online on Facebook and tell us what you like us to review.

E-Mod 116 Online on Facebook

Review : Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back (2001/R)

Were here to walk through the View Askewverse, and travel across country with Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back. We’ve seen most of the VA films (Mallrats being the lone exception) and were originally introduced to Jay and Silent Bob in a theatrical setting with the 1999 film Dogma (which we’ll get around to reviewing eventually.) So it’s nice to see them be the leads in there own movie for once and it be a straight up stoner comedy, as much of other VA films are more angst ridden comedy-drama. So why do we like this film so much? Simple it’s a send up meta joke film that’s while satire a pretty true representation of the Hollywood studio system (it’s pretty much the same today as it was in 2001.) The breaking of the fourth wall with characters asking “A Jay and Silent Bob movie, who pay to see that?” With all the characters on turning the camera looking wry with writer director Kevin Smith playing Silent Bob smiling widely. In fact the casting is top notch, Will Ferrel has a major part as a wildlife marshal. Plus all the numerous bit parts for Hollywood directors and celebrities lampooning themselves and their image (circa 2001 that is.) Honestly it’s refreshing to see a movie give Hollywood a well deserved backhand and razzing because really we all want to do it at one point or another this film just had the balls to do it.

Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back Trailer (Dimension Films/2001)

On a scale of 1.0 to 5.9 it got a 5.6 out of 5.9

Like E-Mod 116 Online on Facebook and tell us what you like us to review.

E-Mod 116 Online on Facebook

Friday Special: TV Sweeps Crossovers. Hourlong drama’s shenannegans.

 Because we need something to grind our axe on, once again we turn to the gift that keeps on giving, the hourlong TV drama. It’s not that were mean just to be mean it’s that hour long TV dramas are the bane of our existence through poor storytelling and being serialized just to be serialized. It also doesn’t help that everything is trying to be like the overly criticaly aclaimed horse crap that’s found on cable television we call it the critic circle jerk because it’s just made for critics who don’t know what they are talking half the time and have their own head up their ass (we’re well aware of the irony that we are a website that critiques movies and TV shows.)  With that said what is it about the crossovers and sweeps that drives us up the wall? The answer is networks like to promote this like it’s the second coming of Jesus (Feb/May/Nov only, and NBC is most notorious for doing that) wow it’s crossover they’ll be in the show it’s like two-for-one know in reality it’s for one scene maybe two minutes tops. TV sweeps also means the bullshit weak plots and irritating and stupid melodrama are turned up to 11 and is firing on all cylinders at a red line RPM. The only good place for crossovers was Star Trek and sitcoms of the 70s and sometimes 80s but then you only had 22 minutes tops to get it all in, you got to the point where as hour-long dramas don’t, it’s just time filler or a time sponge. Which goes back to our golden rule respect our time and once again hour-long TV dramas don’t and this like most of there shenanigans is why they always get terrible bottom of the barrel reviews and scores from us.

Like E-Mod 116 Online on Facebook and tell us what you like us to review.

E-Mod 116 Online on Facebook

Review : 3rd Rock From The Sun – Just Your Average Dick (1998/TV-PG) 

Pretty much after 1995 TV has been downhill. So it’s rare to find a jem of a sitcom episode from so late in the decade that we consider our all time favorite episode of the series.  We will admit 3rd Rock From the Sun is a little one note and one joke with its aliens as humans, this episode stood out for being totally opposet of the basis of the series, the Solomon family being totally normal. While this sounds bland it’s that very blandness that makes it totally hilarious. The condo they move into is painted beige, they order steaks medium, and colas medium size. True to this episode airing in 1998 they wear dockers and polo shirts, that screamed middle America style. One of the most funny and what makes the episode work even today is Sally joining the HOA/Tennants association board and becoming drunk with power. Everyone who is a homeowner can relate to that, as there is always that one board member. In the end we know we always know we’re mean to TV shows, and scream at them for a whole host of reasons, but every now and then well actually then vs now, does an episode succeed by being a total parody of its own premise.

3rd Rock From the Sun – Just Your Average Dick Trailer (Carsey-Warner Productions/1998)

On a scale of 1.0 to 5.9 it got a 5.5 out of 5.9

Like E-Mod 116 Online on Facebook and tell us what you like us to review.

E-Mod 116 Online on Facebook