Review : Smokey and the Bandit (1977/PG)

E-Mod 116 Online was founded in Jacksonville, Florida in 1995. Back then the cities motto was “The bold new city of the south.” While it’s our opinion none of that is true about Jacksonville anymore since 2000, the keyword in that motto is south and that’s really what Smokey and the Bandit is all about. Honestly this film could have just called The South: The Motion Picture. It’s a good ole boy movie. As usual there’s always one element that just makes this film work, this time it rests on none other then Jackie Gleason as Sherrif Buford T. Justice. He just can’t win but it’s chase between him the Bandit and Snowman which is what makes this cat and mouse game almost a live action feature length version of playing with Hot Wheels cars.  

Smokey and the Bandit Trailer (Universal Pictures/1977)

On a scale of 1.0 to 5.9 it got a 5.8 out of 5.9

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Review: The Great Muppet Caper (1981/G)

Sure The Muppet Movie started it all. But The Great Muppet Caper is the far superior film. This is a movie that knows it has a basic plot but also it fully aware it’s a movie. That in of itself it what makes it refeshing to watch. Plus the muppets are real so no all CGI like in today’s world of film. Now it’s not all just muppets that drive this picture. Charles Grodin (we think we spelled that right) steals the show as the arigant vilanous Nick Holiday. It’s the over acting and pure silliness of it all that makes it a joy to watch. This is the pinnacle of the Jim Henson era of the muppets and a timeless ageless classic.

The Great Muppet Caper Trailer (Universal Pictures/1981)

On a scale of 1.0 to 5.9 it got a 5.7 out of 5.9

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Review : Short Circuit (1986/PG)

Twenty two years before Wall-e there was Number 5, as a robot who came to life. While Wall-e was animated, Short Circuit is live action which gives it that touch of realism and believability. It’s the practical effects, namely of Number 5 being an actual robot instead of today where it be all CGI, that much like Baymax of Big Hero 6 makes the character a fan favorite. A side from just the effects, everyone turns in a solid performance, from the always talented and always beautiful (even still today) Ally Sheedy as Stephanie Speck who delivers one of the best lines in the movie in support of Number 5 “Life is not a malfunction.” To G.W. Bailey as Capt. Skroeder while techincaly the “villain” is doing what is right and would be done in real life, by hunting down and capturing a “malfunctioning” laser armed robot. Plus let us also not forget Fisher Stevens as Ben, who is from India (well actually he says his ancestors come from Pittsburgh) and provides the comedy relief by screwing up common English slang and always talking about women. He was the true breakout character of the film and that’s why he along with Number 5 are the two characters that are the stars of Short Citcuit 2.  But the sequel is another review, we’re still talking about the first one. This is an anti war message inspired by life that was created by something designed for war. We don’t know how life itself one day happened eons ago, but it did, and like Number 5 we all crave input as were machines in a sense (honestly we hope E-Mod 116 Online serves as input on some sort of level to you or any life reading it.) This is a damn  near perfect film, a sweet and pleasing story, characters that endure, and a timeless new classic that is always fresh and original.

Short Circuit Trailer (Tri Star Pictures/1986)

On a scale of 1.0 to 5.9 it got a 5.7 out of 5.9

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Friday Special: The Late Show with Stephen Colbert – An Exercise in Destroying a Franchise.

Stephen Colbert and his writers took the 22 year legacy of prestige, with class, and then basically raped it as hard as they could before killing it and flushing it’s quivering lifeless corpse down the toilet after dismembering it with a rusty broken hacksaw. In fact hack is the word that best describes what the “real Stephen Colbert” is. That piddly ass horse shit of playing a blow hard political pundit belongs on cable television back in 2005 where it made sense. Not on broadcast television where the overly loud obnoxious audience, who remind us of the later terrible seasons of Married With Children in 1995, make you want to throw the remote at the screen so hard you’ll break it because it’s easiest and fastest way to make it go away. WE DON’T WANT TO WATCH THE CLOBERT REPORT! We want the The Late Show. Three painfully unfunny minuets with a demonic skull as another unfunny excuse to tell who the sponsor was, is total bullshit and amateur bush league stuff. When we fast forward through a chunk of the show and deleted it off our DVR after only watching 27 minuets this is without a doubt the worst talk show we’ve ever seen. Even the order it was executed was wrong. Show open first, then the monologue, and for fuck sake hire a goddamn announcer, your not Craig Kilborn on The Daily Show back in 1998. True we don’t watch the Tonight Show even though Jimmy Fallon destroyed that by making it a show about skits and stupid games, but we stopped watching that in 1993 under Jay Leno when David Letrrman started his show, so since we never watched it we don’t care if it was destroyed, this show however we did watch. We hope the ratings for this drop and the affiliates revolt as that will be the only way the Late Show will be saved.

On a scale of 1.0 to 5.9 it got a 1.0 out of 5.9

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Review : Mr. Peabody and Sherman (2014/PG)

Remember that episode of The Simpsons called Bart to the Future where 40 year old Bart would say to people “What happened to you (insert name here.) You used to be cool.” That’s what we’re asking DreamWorks Aimation. So it’s not a total bash fest this early here is the list of movies they made that we like – Antz, The Road to El Dorado, Shrek, Shrek 2, Over The Hedge, and Puss in Boots. The rest however seem to be falling into that tired DreamWorks formula (much like the cracks are starting to show in Pixars tried and true playbook, with screen writer Michael Arndt slowly ripping out its pages, burning them, and pissing on the ashes) it’s trying to be too hip and clever for its own damn good. Mr Peabody and Sherman had great potential but suffered at trying to reboot and beef up the characters. This should have been just them having time traveling adventures, maybe bring along another person at some point, as the cartoons were a series of diffrent events. Instead it fails by trying to streach out a 7 min concept to 92 min. It’s trying to be hip and with it, craming in pop songs and using that stylized 1950s retro cool look. The film had all the elements to work, but once again the DreamWorks Animation formula killed it.

Mr. Peabody and Sherman Trailer (DreamWorks Animation/2014)
On a scale of 1.0 to 5.9 it got a 2.9 out of 5.9

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Review : Tucker & Dale vs Evil (2010/R)

It’s about a cabin in the woods but not Cabin in the Woods but it was released in 2010, so then wait what is this? It’s actually Tucker & Dale vs Evil, which the other film we just mentioned, flips the alone in the woods scenario upside down. Honestly we found it  refreshing to see horror mocked, as thanks to toture porn from one note no talent hacks like James Wan and Eli Roth, the genre needed a good kick in the balls. Now yes the low budget and story has a slight hampering effect on it over all but also the gore played for laughs, in fact think of it like an episode of Threes Company but with more murdering and gore. We see an opportunity for a franchise to start here however being a low-budget independent it probably won’t happen

Tucker & Dale vs Evil (Magnet Releasing/2010)

On a scale of 1.0 to 5.9 it got a 4.9 out of 5.9

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