Review : 3rd Rock From The Sun – Just Your Average Dick (1998/TV-PG) 

Pretty much after 1995 TV has been downhill. So it’s rare to find a jem of a sitcom episode from so late in the decade that we consider our all time favorite episode of the series.  We will admit 3rd Rock From the Sun is a little one note and one joke with its aliens as humans, this episode stood out for being totally opposet of the basis of the series, the Solomon family being totally normal. While this sounds bland it’s that very blandness that makes it totally hilarious. The condo they move into is painted beige, they order steaks medium, and colas medium size. True to this episode airing in 1998 they wear dockers and polo shirts, that screamed middle America style. One of the most funny and what makes the episode work even today is Sally joining the HOA/Tennants association board and becoming drunk with power. Everyone who is a homeowner can relate to that, as there is always that one board member. In the end we know we always know we’re mean to TV shows, and scream at them for a whole host of reasons, but every now and then well actually then vs now, does an episode succeed by being a total parody of its own premise.

3rd Rock From the Sun – Just Your Average Dick Trailer (Carsey-Warner Productions/1998)

On a scale of 1.0 to 5.9 it got a 5.5 out of 5.9

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Review : Star Trek : The Next Generation – Half A Life (1991/TV-PG)

Star Trek : The Next Generation was on for 178 episodes, not all of them were winners, and Half A Life was one of the losers. What makes this episode so bad, simple just like Once Upon a Time, The Walking Dead, or any drama on television today (yes we’re including you Netflix) nothing was resolved, concluded, or explained. This means it broke our golden rule “Respect our Time” it doesn’t matter this episode aired in 1991 it still wasted our time now. What makes it worse this episode had top notch guest stars such as Majel Barrett, David Ogden Stiers, and Michelle Forbes. But no matter how much star power you pack when the story of having to go back to your planet to die when you turn 60 and that planets sun is dying, is never resolved make this one of the most pointless, irritating, and stupid episodes of Star Trek we’ve ever seen. This isn’t entertainment this is embarrassment.

Star Trek : The Next Generation – Half A Life Trailer (Paramount Television/1991)
On a scale of 1.0 to 5.9 it got a 1.6 out of 5.9

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Review : Once Upon A Time – Darkness on the Edge of Town (2015/TV-PG)

Once Upon A Time is without a doubt a series that tries our patience, for the sole reason it’s searlized. An iron clad rule of E-Mod 116 Online is that TV shows need to be respectful of your time, and forcing you to watch a 22 hour story isn’t just disrespectful it’s down right rude. Secondly the pacing is all over the place as its constantly does flashbacks or what the characters did in the fairytale universe. For those who don’t know the series was created by and this episode was written by Edward Kitsis & Adam Horowitz who actually penned the fantastic 2010 film Tron : Legacy however they are also responsible for Lost. Look we never watched an episode of Lost, but we know the bullshit it created with side universes and parallel stories. Bottom line they are doing that same horse shit with this series which makes it hard to watch and down right confusing with its story with pacing that jumps around so much the editor needs to be fired. There we feel better now, so let’s get on with the review of the episode finally (much like how the series takes too long to get to anything.)  So basically in a nutshell it took 54 minuets so say Emma Swan could be dark hearted. Really? It’s bad enough this is turning into a Disney character gang bang with piss poor relation to the source material. First off Cruella de Vil doesn’t have magical powers nor is she a fairy tale character, seriously did the writers of episode not watch the movie she’s from first? Then there is Ursula who works at an aquarium in New York, and barely used for the mindnumbiling slow episode, while atleast it’s sea based at the same time  her whole character is not really faithful to the source material. Once Upon A Time’s ultimate failure is what it’s desperately trying to do take what’s old and put a fresh spin on it, but in the end it spins so much it’s a dizzy and disjointed mess.

On a scale of 1.0 to 5.9 it got at 2.5 out of 5.9